This is the 3rd time Elhan has been hospitalised in the span of 6 months. Today was the 7th day he is in the hospital. I had the scare of my life when his breathing was so different last week, luckily we were at the emergency department when his lips turned blue ish. When the doctors told me that he has to be placed in the HDU as his oxygen levels were very low, it really was a slap to my face.
I lost Elhan’s 2 elder siblings and any hint of a medical scare is just something else. When I saw Elhan with the tubes it really reminded me of Jibrael & I even told the nurse. Jibrael passed away because of her lungs and every time lung infection is mentioned about Elhan I am just reminded of Jibrael. I cannot bear to risk anything more.
Elhan was diagnosed with pneumonia. Alhamdulillah he is much better now, thanks to the amazing specialist that he has, the caring staff nurses & your prayers. Good news, our prayers are answered today as he just got out of the hospital this evening. He is the happiest and smiled so big like someone who just got to breathe fresh air after not being confined to a small space filled with constant traumatic treatments and procedures for a whole week.
However, observation, monitoring and treatments needs to be continued at home. Doctor reminded me again that I have to give more work and more focus on Elhan’s health since this is already the 4 time he is hospitalised. He needs more care & attention now more than ever since this time around it’s been the worst he has ever been.
According to the doctor now is a critical time for me to take care of him since he is very prone to illness.
So far since he was admitted I have been with Elhan 24/7 through it all. Cancelled everything else including work related matters the past week to focus on him.
But now... what? I now know I need to be hands on with everything eventhough I’m also a working mum. I have this dilemma right now. Feeling of not doing enough for the kids, not being there enough, not preventing enough. Right now I’m just talking about Elhan I haven’t even started about Evren.
Of course, work is also for them. It’s not just about the company, the career, the team and everyone else. But right now, when something beyond your control happens, when health is at stake, it really hits. At a cross road and a dilemma for me right now.
